Monday, October 26, 2009

Random Thoughts

I've been cleaning the kitchen, dining room, picking up toys and checking stuff on the internet tonight and I just had this memory come to mind.

About 5 days before my Dad passed away, I was able to have a few moments with him at the dining room table. He was sitting across from me with his Bible open, on the table. I think he was reading....I'm not sure at that point. He had his glasses on. I was watching him. He looked up and told me a joke....I don't remember it...what I do remember is, I was about to laugh at it but in a split second my Dad started crying. I asked him why he was crying and he said he was crying because I hadn't laughed at his joke. Bittersweet. So I had to explain to him that I was about to laugh but he had started crying and just as quick as that he said, "oh, okay." A few minutes later he had his head down...reading his Bible....and he looks at me and starts crying and he says..."God is so good to me...I don't deserve him....God is so good to me....I just don't know how I can ever repay Him for what He's done in my life". I honestly don't remember my response but I find myself many times going back to that time. My Dad had truly fallen in love with Jesus. Siblings may have different opinions and many comments but I lived with my Dad for 22 years. I remember the story of how he prayed to God that if He would get my Dad out of that crazy Pentecostal church (he was visiting) he (my Dad) would live for Him (Jesus) : )
Even though my Dad had the Holy Ghost for so many years and "lived" for God, he was what some would say "rough around the edges". From what I can remember....during the last few months of his life and I believe because of his illness (the Parkinsons)...he also had CHF, that it affected his mind in a special way....and I say that in a sweet way. He got to draw super close to God that it changed who my Dad was and had become.
I would call my Mom often and ask how Dad was doing. Most times she would say that he had had a rough night and then after that...he would be talking in his sleep and reach out his hand to someone and name them by name and ask for their forgiveness...I could name some names that my Mom shared with me but I know some of you wouldn't believe me. He would ask for forgiveness....not only for the things he had done to them (from years ago, everything that he could remember) but also for the bad feelings that he had towards them...even if they didn't know...wether or not they were dead or living still.
She would also say on some nights he would wake up and be praying and talking in tongues...talking to Jesus....singing songs...making them up. Asking God to save his children and calling each of their names.... Come to think of Mom probably has some awesome things to tell. You know, even though he may have been in pain....I liked to hear about the nights...because I knew God was answering my prayers...God don't let him die lost....God don't let him die lost....I need to know that he's gonna make it! He let me know ; )
Oh There's so much I want to post about my Dad & Mom and what they did through the years for & friends and strangers & church people that some people have just taken for granted....who don't know....who don't/won't understand.....They want/wanted to serve God doing whatever they could and it always seemed to involve our house, physical labor, time & money (even if they couldn't afford it)....yeah I'm bragging on my Dad & Mom tonight and most of all JESUS because without Him and his patient, tender, loving care....none of this would be worth bragging about ; )

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